Hilariously Tasteless

There's Irony...And Then There's Irony

WHILE PUTTING SOME NEW TUNES IN MY COMPUTER, I came across this odd bit of info. One of the songs on the Rock Instrumental Classics, Vol. 3 disc I uploaded was "Rock & Roll, Part 2", the formerly ubiquitous sports stadium anthem by Gary Glitter. So I did a search on Glitter (to upload the album art to go with the song) and found something ironic.

"Rock & Roll, Part 2" was played at virtually every sporting event, professional or college level, in virtually every town for years -- that is, until Glitter (whose real name is Paul Gadd) was convicted on child pornography charges in 1999, and then (as if that wasn't enough) child sexual abuse charges in 2005. Long story short: Glitter is a totally awesome guy, right? Once those unsavory details surfaced, most sports franchises decided, "Maybe we should stop playing this song to get the crowd riled up."

Most sports franchises did that. Some did not. And here's where the irony comes in.

According to (the notoriously accurate) Wikipedia, among the teams still playing "Rock & Roll, Part 2" during games is the NHL team in Nashville. What's the name of that team?

The Predators, of course!

Go Predators!

More Juice Please!

"O.J. Simpson is a suspect in an alleged armed robbery of sports memorabilia in a Las Vegas casino hotel room and will be interviewed by authorities later today."

So begins the story in The Los Angeles Times today. And I have to wonder two things: Why did the LAPD go all the way to Vegas to frame him for this crime? And why aren't they pursuing the Columbian Drug Lords who are obviously responsible? It's very puzzling.

Simpson, who was very cooperative with the police, explained that he was merely retrieving items known to be stolen, items that were rightfully his. He didn't break in to the hotel room. He said he was escorted up to the room (a dicey choice of words when it comes to Vegas) by an auction house owner.

"In any event," Simpson added, "it's stolen stuff that's mine. Nobody was roughed up."

Hmmm. Roughed up, eh?

I like to imagine that Simpson said those last four words with a wink and a smile. Just to let everyone know that he's still got it, and that, if push came to shove, he could still cut somebody's head off if he needed to.

You know, just for old times' sake.

Worst Case Scenarios: China Edition

SO WHAT'S THE WORST THAT COULD HAPPEN if you're a top drug regulator who takes a bunch of bribes to approve substandard medicines? Is it that you'll actually kill a bunch of people? Are you sure that's the worst that could happen? Because it's not what's happening to China's former head of the State Food and Drug Administration. After being found guilty of taking bribes of cash and gifts totalling more than $800,000, 62-year-old Zheng Xiaoyu was sentenced to death.

To death. This is China we're talking about. They're not what you'd call real big on the human rights, so death it is.

One of the products Zheng Xiaoyu allowed through was a toothpaste, found on Central American and Caribbean store shelves, called Mr. Cool. Along with its cavity-fighting fluoride, Mr. Cool also has a special ingredient: diethylene glycol, an industrial solvent used a lot in antifreeze. The New York Times has referred to it as a "syrupy poison." Well, I guess that's bad on Zheng for allowing diethylene glycol to be packaged and sold as ordinary glycerine. You see, it's cheaper than glycerine and sweeter than glycerine. So you could see how it makes fiscal sense...except for the "more poisonous than glycerine" part. This on the heels of the melamine-tainted pet food business.

Not what you'd call a banner year for Zheng. Even so, a death sentence? Wow, China, that's hard-core.