Keep It In Your Pants

ALL ARTISTS HAVE EGOS to some extent. It's what helps convince them that anyone would care what they had to say or do or write or paint. But what kind of ego must you have to be this guy?



That's Pricasso. He paints with his dick. Seriously. He paints nudes (no surprise there) and portraits (of world leaders, no less), using his dick as a paintbrush. To fill in the background, sometimes he uses other body parts.



Now, admittedly his name is mostly just a pun. He could have gone with Vincent Van Cock, Claude Bone-et, Balls Gauguin or Dick-elangelo. But I love that he chose a name that brings to mind Picasso, one of the greatest artists ever. And after visiting Pricasso's web site, I get the feeling it was no accident, like people should sit up and take notice of his painting talent. He's definitely the best artist who paints with his dick. I'll give him that.

Oh yeah, he's also a kickass poet. His use of "ware", "Virgina" and "cloths" really makes you think.

Me Answering Questions Now!

IT HAS BEEN SIX YEARS since President Bush asked America, "Is our children learning?" And it has been a long wait for the answer. But finally today in New York City, while adressing a roomful of elementary school students, our Education President, who has promised to leave no child behind, answered that thorny question.

"Childrens do learn," Bush said, "when standards are high and results are measured."

It is a relief. I am so happy for the childrens! All of those childrens! Them will be glad to find out that them's hard work were not in vain.

But don't worry. If this makes you feel a little embarrassed about our Commander in Chief, the official transcript of the event was edited so as to be grammatically correct.

See how awesome history is when you can change it?